Name's Jay. You're going to incorrectly think I'm wrong all the time. Now that we have introductions out of the way, lets move on.
When Nightwish came on to the scene with their Symphonic/Operatic approach to Power Metal, it was noticeably unique in the sense that while other Power Metal bands that had orchestra backings used them sparingly or only to add to the scope that the metal instruments created, Nightwish used it as the main focus of their music. When you get down to it, most people (that is, people without musical taste) don't like metal, or at least don't know that they like it. This is why I believe so many fucking dolts throw up the horns when they clearly only listen to rap and metalcore, the two most un-metal genres of music.
Nightwish's approach to songwriting by putting the symphonic arrangements ahead of their metal has without a doubt been scientifically designed to consistently sell without fail. It's precisely like Hair Metal, yet unlike Hair Metal, shows no sign of dying in the future. They've done the impossible. They've achieved the endless success of a pop legend, with a metalhead fanbase. No band should have that kind of power.
While this has indeed widened Power Metal's audience, it will eventually only narrow their taste. What do I mean? Well, whether you hate Metal Archives or not, look up their similar artists page and check out the BILLIONS OF NIGHTWISH CLONES. I can not stress how fucking blatant and boring each one of these bands are. This genre might as well be called Nightwish Metal. Metal Archives has the audacity to list Amberian Dawn as a Neo-Classical Metal band, yet 20 seconds of listening to one of their "We wish we were as big as Nightwish" songs made me to groan so hard that I caused an avalanche somewhere in the rocky mountains, killing half a group of friends forcing the other half to make a perilous journey to civilization while they're being stalked by an unknown beast that the avalanche unearthed.
I don't even really need to describe Symphonic Metal's characteristics. I could much more easily tell you to listen to a Nightwish song. There, you've heard every single Symphonic Metal song. Many bands will try to duck this and call themselves a "Gothic Metal Band". Don't be fooled. They are one and the same. Drummers range from lackluster to decent, Bassists are even less present than actual power metal, Guitarists are only there because they have to make them sound edgy, or because they do the death growls that half of the Nightwish clones do. Keyboardists are either the main writers or are only there because they can't fit an orchestra on a 10x20 stage, and the vocalist is always, ALWAYS, a woman. This is the unerring law of all Symphonic Metal bands. The only two questions you have to ask someone when forming a Symphonic Metal band are "Is it a chick?" and "does she sing like Tarja?". Two yes's? Congratulations! You have a Symphonic Metal band and by the time you all meet your checks'll be in the mail!
This kind of metal is simple as balls to play and requires nearly no experience in playing solos. I should know. I suck at solos. Drummers only need to listen to the radio and be able to play at the blistering pace of an Alicia Keys song, and bassists need to be able to pick a string. This shit makes Breaking the Law and Paranoid tabs look like an Yngwie Malmsteen self indulgent ego trip that he calls an album. And even the shit that is pushed forward as the main focus of the songwriting is hardly that great. Listening to Leaves' Eyes, I can almost hear the cellists falling asleep in their chairs. If you want some glorious orchestra to display their skill along with the metal, why pass on Blind Guardian, Pathfinder, or Rhapsody/Rhapsody of Fire/Luca Turilli's Rhapsody/Rhapsody IV:The Rhapsodying? Nightwish is not in it for the artistic integrity of pushing the boundaries of Metal like so many claim/once claimed. This isn't like Folk Metal where there's no sacrifice on the Metal side. Any Metal in symphonic metal is being strapped down on an altar and is being tortured by mildly attractive classical singers and their useless bandmates.
There was a time when we all hated Hair Metal. We thought it was a bunch of pussies in mom's stockings playing a watered down version of True Metal. Well I bet you anything that Motley Crue could kick the shit out of Epica even with Mick Mars being incapable of moving his torso and Tommy Lee without his billions of STD medication. Symphonic Metal is the new Pop Metal. And we will only listen to Symphonic metal for the same reason we did Hair metal. Because that chick we think is into us is going to their concert next week.
No comments:
Post a Comment